What does running mean to you?

What Running means to me……………..

What running used to mean to me:

Running was a punishment if we missed free throws. Running was a punishment for being late for practice. Running meant that I would get skinny and that meant I would be loved. It meant that I wouldn’t have to take my anti depressants. Running meant that I had a reason to wear cute running outfits as long as I lost the weight to do so. Running meant that I could eat as much food as I wanted and drink as many ciders as I wanted to. Running meant I would have my sanity and it meant that I was worth something.

I think it changes for me as I progress into a more experienced runner and a healthier individual.

What Running means to me now:

Means friendship and family…community. It means waking up before most of the rest of the world. It means quality time with me. It means seeing parts of trails I wouldn't have otherwise seen and meeting people I wouldn't have met. Running means to me....taking pride in my daily routine. It means being a healthy example to the people around me. It means taking care of the 1 body I was given. The time I spend running….no one is telling me I am not good enough, I don’t feel like I have to impress anyone but myself. It means putting one foot in front of the other even when I am exhausted. To me, it means being “injured” …just means that maybe the next couple weeks of running will be a little more uncomfortable than usual. Running to me, is setting a goal and meeting it….challenging myself and then meeting that challenge.  Living in a world where everything is shaped around convenience... everybody wants things as easy as possible… then when something difficult comes up we don’t know how to face it…or we choose not to because it’s too hard. I never want to be the person who says, "Nope, cant do it." I don’t want to live like that. I don’t want to teach my kids to live like that. I don’t want to be an example of that to my nieces and nephew. I want to be the definition of hard work. To not hesitate in the face of hard work. I never want FEAR to get in the way of my goals. Running teaches me how to go up against challenges and trails head on and to not run away from it. I am becoming the best version of myself with my training. So I welcome the days of soreness, the loss of toe nails, and the embarrassing finishes-because, with it comes the satisfaction of knowing I have put in hard work even when I didn’t have to. When the rest of the world would understand if I quit, I still didn’t. To me, running is a gift… a gift I don’t intend on taking for granted.  Running to me means, getting up when it’s still dark and running in the rain even though I would rather be sleeping. I love the quote that goes something like …. If you are ever losing faith in humanity, go watch a marathon… there is something about people coming together all with a goal of working hard and finishing… it’s a beautiful thing..everything from the runners to the volunteers and the spectators.  Running… it’s an incredible and underrated way of life…it’s not just an activity or exercise. It trains your mind and soul as much as your body. Teaches you the meaning of perseverance. It means showing people even though the world has tried to break you...you can keep going and you can lead a beautiful life. It means to keep going when all you want to do is close your eyes and give up. To give in to the darkness. Life is beautiful… but as many highs as it has…there are many lows. I hit one of my lowest lows and I thank god that I was in the middle of training. Running saved my life. Running teaches me to not be a victim. It teaches me to be the hero of my own life. Because, when you are at mile 19 of a 50k… and it’s 85 degrees… and your diaphragm feels like it’s trying to bust out of you and your feet feel like they’re going to fall off and you come up to the aid station. They let you know you are allowed to quit or you can keep going. At that moment, quitting sounds pretty great. To sit down and have a rest.... But, that feeling you get when you cross the finish line even though you thought you couldn’t…that feeling right there…NOTHING can ever take that away. Nothing will ever match that feeling of continuing to fight when you have no fight left. Still think running is just exercise?  Everyone should have something in their life that makes them fight to work harder…fight to get better... fight to live a more fulfilling life. And running is my something. When you come from not even being able to run a mile without stopping….and then running mountains, it becomes something more than exercise or an activity. What is running to me? It’s everything.  

Take a minute-what does running mean to you?